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She was always the one who could do it all...

Updated: Feb 14, 2023

She was always the one who could do it all.

She was a devoted wife, a loving mother of three, and a successful businesswoman. She was the one everyone turned to when they needed something done, and she was always happy to help. But as time went on, she found herself feeling more and more burnt out. She had lost sight of who she was outside of being a mother and a career woman. She was exhausted, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't seem to keep up.

One day, as she was sitting in her office, staring at her computer screen, she realized that she needed to make a change. She couldn't keep going like this, always putting everyone else's needs before her own. She needed to start loving herself first.

At first, it felt selfish. She was used to being the one who took care of everyone else, and the idea of putting her own needs first seemed foreign to her. But she realized that if she didn't take care of herself, she wouldn't be able to take care of anyone else.

So, she started small. She made time for herself each day, whether it was taking a walk or building in the time for the lunch she typical skips over. She started saying no to things that didn't align with her values or priorities. She set boundaries with her colleagues, friends, and family letting them know that she needed time to recharge and take care of herself.

As she started prioritizing herself more, she found that she had more energy and was able to be more present for her family and her work. She was able to enjoy her time with her kids more fully, without feeling guilty about taking a break from work. She was also able to be more productive and focused at work, without feeling drained or overwhelmed.

Most importantly, she was able to rediscover herself. She had spent so much of her life putting everyone else's needs before her own, that she had lost sight of who she was and what she wanted. By prioritizing herself and her well-being, she was able to reconnect with herself and her passions.

Who is she? Maybe, she is you. Maybe, she is us.

It's easy to get caught up in the idea that our needs come second to everyone else's. But the truth is, we can't be the best version of ourselves if we don't take care of ourselves first. We need to give ourselves permission to take time for ourselves, to pursue our passions, and to invest in our own well-being.

Loving ourselves first means setting boundaries, saying no when we need to, and prioritizing our own needs. It's not selfish, it's necessary. When we love ourselves first, we become better mothers, wives, and friends. We model self-care and self-love for our children and those around us. As women and mothers, we often feel guilty about taking time for ourselves. We worry that we're not doing enough for our families, or that we're being selfish by putting our own needs first. But the truth is, taking care of ourselves is not only necessary, but it's also an act of love.

So, if you're feeling burnt out and overwhelmed, take a moment to ask yourself: what does it mean to love myself first? Start small and take steps to prioritize yourself and your well-being. Practicing self-compassions is a great way to start! You'll be amazed at how much it can change your life, and the lives of those around you.

Here are some resources for self-compassion:

I will leave you with one last reminder, while you may feel the pressure to do it all, you don't have to. In a world that often glorifies busyness and productivity, it can be easy to feel like we need to constantly be doing more, achieving more, and striving for more. But the truth is, it's okay to slow down, to take breaks, and to give yourself permission to just be. It's easy to fall into the trap of feeling like you need to be everything to everyone, but the truth is, you are only one person and it's okay to ask for help, to delegate tasks, and to take time for yourself.

With Care,

Dr. Chance

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